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tomorroweverything always leads up
to that one moment;
the one line that must be taken;
the one shout that must be heard
and i will never again
hear your cries in the night,
if i could change the fate's design
and turn away time
life after death would only
be an unreachable dream,
capital punishment to the underworld.
i will never grant god my
papercuti will hold onto
all the kisses you wish to hide
from the world
i will hold onto every night
that will be no more;
and i hope they burn
ignore me now,
as i write with
passive aggressive adjectives;
a broken hearted memoir.
ultimatums have never been my forte
but here we stand,
one can not succeed while the other exists.
don't wish to be apart of me
tachyarrhythmiasand while my mind is wishing on time
and fallen stars
speeds will soar
and my vessels will burst.
but you will fall to the floor
for their petty stories
and beautiful eyes;
they don't need makeup to be pretty.
matteri. there are words that flutter from my mouth
like grammatical whirlwinds;
i wish they tattooed your skin
the way your english scars mine.
we could be beautiful together.
ii. i wished upon binary stars
because they reminded me of your eyes,
hypnotic, dangerous, ever-moving,
never have i ever been
more lost in intergalactic space.
iii. movements become lost with time.
i am no longer sure who i am when against your body;
a force, a storm, a sky, a star?
multiple personality disorder has taken over.
all i need as an anchor.
blueshe was blue
in the loosest term possible.
her bones were frail and had their own
story to tell within the lies of men
and betrayals of love
that had long left her with better options
while she had no visible
her skin was burned from
summer's hot lust
and winter's white hot longing.
her eyes held oceans,
blue and painful against the shores;
they were golden earth,
and painfully beautiful.
she was the dream you lived for
and she was the hope you died for.
she was the stars in the night sky
and she was the blue in the sky.
but she is not broken.
brilliance I sighed to myself, just as my mother would have had she been sitting in my car driving along State Road 19. The startling problem I had at this point was the fact I was entirely like her. The woman that had sent me on a one way road to Hell, the person I swore to the smallest stars I would never become, and yet here sat the replica of the 17 year old Monica Renee Withers. It was a damn shame that I had wasted away into a terrible wastrel. My brother turned the radio down, reclining in the passenger seat.
"What's your deal?" I asked, flicking the end of my cigarette out the window. Romantically, I loved smoking. I coughed, rolling up the window.
Physically, not so much.
"Your addictions gave me a migraine," Brian pouted. The 19 year old sitting not 6 inches away from me was dying; my brother was dying. The doctors had officially titled it Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome, but kept to c
Mental Disorder Discrimination"You said you've got depression?
No you don't, you attention seeker.
You're just an average teenager with the perfect life
Desperately looking for sympathy."
Stop crying, you coward.
You're just a childish "scaredy-cat".
Blaming your problems on a mental disorder
That doesn't even exist."
"So you're schizophrenic?
Grow the hell up, and stop acting like a child
You're too old for imaginary friends
You callow, juvenile, little twit."
But if we're attention seekers,
Why do we try so hard to hide our feelings from the world?
Why do we isolate ourselves in our rooms,
Desperately hiding the cuts on our wrists
Trying our best to live a normal life?
And if we're simply "scaredy-cats",
Why is our fear so vividly intense?
Unlike simple fear, our anxiety will stick with us forever
A severe long-lasting feeling of powerful panic.
A feeling from which we'll never be free.
Suddenly we're childish for having a mental disorder?
Schizophrenia is not something we can control.
PainParalized by the suffering
A shiver down my spine
Images of my past haunt me
No one can save me from this hell
to me you are perfect
I do not know the reasons
for all those scars burning
against your bright skin
you've been soaking
a pain reminiscing from past
we both cannot recollect
yet you are so beautiful..
when night gets darker
and I am the one...
who's hungered to undress
the spirit of you
slowly revealing the layers
coming off from shadows
disguised in desires
craving to be fulfilled
I will caress every corner
of your silhouette
until I figure the true shape
of your heart
I will rub those blisters
softly until every nerve
of you gushes into a river
and you moan into a life
I had promised you
years ago when we began
to breathe into each other
for all the truths
I must swallow
and lessons I must learn
you are the one
I am destined to discover
what it means
to love in perfection
YouIf you’re a girl, you’re a girl.
If you’re a boy, you’re a boy.
If you’re white, you’re white.
If you’re black, you’re black.
If you’re gay, you’re gay.
If you’re bi, you’re bi.
If you’re straight, you’re straight.
If you’re religious, you’re religious.
If you’re an atheist, you’re an atheist.
If you’re mentally disabled, you’re still human.
If you’re physically disabled, you’re still human.
For everything you are:
So who are they to judge you for who you are?
i can't keep walking on these dry-rot bonesoh, i am not a poet;
like the ink scratches
of plath, i am
specter boy: decay,
dispose, & disappoint
because this is the way
that writers wane -
(this hangman head is no
survivor story, & gods
do not burn out
you talk like a travestyoh, mercury boy, you can't
write your way out of this
body or out of this mind;
you can pray like it's high-fashion,
insist you're only burning yourself out
(but tell me - do you feel like a god yet?)
if only for murky mirrors &
silver cicadas caught
in your ribcage, you've
got a knack for decaying
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Lilyas has dedicated herself to making our community a brighter place with her vibrant artwork and infectious enthusiasm for interacting with others in our community. It has certainly paid off, as many deviants flock to her page on a daily basis to let her know how much of an inspiration she is. We absolutely agree, and couldn't let all that hard work go without recognition, so it's with great pride that we bestow the Deviousness Award for March 2014, to ... Read More